


147. Ryan has a loaded conversation with Sam's dad, Ron Worthington

by alleyoops, jennandanica



Series: Citadel: Sam Worthington and Ryan Kwanten [147]
Category: Actor RPF, Australian Actor RPF, Citadel (Journalfen RPG), True Blood RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-26
Updated: 2017-04-26
Packaged: 2018-10-24 07:34:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10737072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alleyoops/pseuds/alleyoops, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jennandanica/pseuds/jennandanica





	147. Ryan has a loaded conversation with Sam's dad, Ron Worthington

It's been nearly thirty-six hours since Sam and Ryan arrived back in Sam's hometown of Perth, and somehow Sam's parents have still managed to not breathe a word about their engagement. Even knowing that Ron would probably rather die than acknowledge reality, Ryan can't help feeling like it's the big gay elephant in the room. Still, at least they've all managed to get along. They had a really nice picnic on the beach for lunch, and at dinner Ron actually permitted Ryan to put a fresh marinade on a few of the steaks, eventually deeming them tolerable. Now Jeanne is trying to teach Ryan a bit about baking, and he hasn't burned anything beyond recognition yet, so he figures he's doing okay.

Leaving Sam to a phone call from one of his mates, Ron wanders into the kitchen, checking out the baked goods cooling on the counter. He snags a piece of shortbread, munching on it while looking out the back window with an occasional glance over at Jeanne and Ryan. "Are you two almost done there?"

Jeanne raises an eyebrow at that, giving Ryan a look. "Almost. Why?"

"I thought Ryan might go for a walk with me," Ron says with a sharp shrug.

"Oh. Sure." Ryan's a bit taken aback, but if he's honest with himself then he's not entirely surprised. He washes his hands at the sink, and gives Jeanne a grin. "Am I dismissed, Admiral?"

"Most definitely," Jeanne says. "You can help me ice the last of the sugar cookies when you get back," she adds with a smile, giving her husband a pointed look as they head out of the kitchen.

"It's still pretty warm out," Ron says, grabbing his keys and sliding his wallet into his back pocket. "You probably don't even need a jacket." He ushers Ryan out the front door and locks up behind him, gesturing towards the left as the way he wants to go.

"All right." Ryan slips his hands into his pockets out of habit, trying to make himself seem smaller somehow. He's not sure whether it's actually ever worked. "Beautiful day," he murmurs, squinting into the sunshine.

Ron nods. "Gorgeous weather." He blows out a breath, glancing around, before looking over at Ryan. His son's fiance. Jesus. "I expect Sam told you I was a little taken aback by your engagement?" 

Ryan nods, chewing on his lip. "He... he mentioned that, yeah." He raged about it, more like. But Ryan figures he doesn't need to point that out. Not yet, anyway.

"It's not that I have anything against you," Ron says slowly, feeling his way through a conversation pitted with landmines. "I don't think Sam could want for a better partner."

"You just... you expected Sam's partner to be female," Ryan murmurs, nodding his head and frowning down at a crack in the pavement. Sure, if it weren't for his cock, then he'd be perfectly unobjectionable to Sam's parents.

"Yes and no." Ron sighs. "Not since he brought you home the first time. But he is our only son and I guess I still held out hopes that he'd carry on the family name and continue to have this brilliant career he seems headed for..."

"He will. And I think it's pretty brilliant already," Ryan replies, not wanting to let Sam's success be downplayed for an instant. "As for the children... that's up to him," he says softly, smiling at a passerby. "It always would have been, no matter who he was with."

"Maybe, but they're not going to be his with you, are they?"

Ryan sucks in a breath, trying to cover for how much the question hurts him. Christ, that's not his fucking fault! Is he supposed to engineer a new era of genetic biology just to appease Ron's need for the family name to be continued? "Right," he agrees softly. "They'll either be his or mine, but not ours." And how lovely that Ron would remind him of _that_ lingering pain, as well.

Ron nods. "Of course that would be the same if he married a girl and couldn't have kids. They'd have to adopt or something," he says, scratching the back of his neck. "I guess I just worry about whether you've both really thought this through. I mean, it's one thing hoping he'll still be able to work and all, but what if he can't? Jeanne gets annoyed enough with me at home and we don't have all that many years left. What are you going to do with a forty-year-old man who's not done anything except build houses and make movies and has his whole life still ahead of him?"

"You're saying you think it would be smarter if we broke up. Better planning for the future," Ryan says. It's an interesting strategy, sure -- pretending to take the emotional component right out of things.

Ron stops in his tracks. "No. I'm not saying that. But I don't think it's out of place for me to wonder if the two of you have talked about this. How you picture things being when he _does_ come out and if work _does_ dry up."

"No." Since Ron has stopped walking, Ryan does as well, but he keeps his gaze on the horizon. "My guess is Sam figured on plenty of time to sort that out, since he's giving us four years before we even get married." Four years for doubts to creep in and reality to assert its ugly head, but Ryan's private fears are neither here nor there in this discussion. "He's playing it pretty cautious." And Ron's giving Sam zero credit for doing so, in Ryan's opinion. Like they're about to dash off to Vegas.

"I don't think I'm making myself clear," Ron says, which is no surprise. Both his son and his wife tell him he sucks at getting to the point of anything. "How do you picture things in a worst-case scenario? Are you still going to want and love the Sam who's not making movies, who's sitting at home, playing his metal music, drinking way too much beer? He's got a lot of money right now and it may seem like you can do anything - travel, hobbies, whatever - but if he retires at forty, there are a lot of years left. And before you get your back up, I'm not saying you're with him for his money or because he's a movie star, I'm asking you if you've thought beyond the wedding."

"I haven't really thought about the wedding at all. Beyond deciding that neither of us is going to wear a white dress." But Ryan gets what Ron is asking. He sighs. "I'm sure you're right, that I'll have to kick his ass to get him out of the house and make him work off the beer belly. But I love Sam for who he is, not... not _what_ he is. I don't know if you really want to hear that." Finally Ryan lets his gaze cross Ron's, his jaw tight. "I'm going to be around to take care of Sam, regardless of whether we get married. And regardless of whether he continues to be successful. Because I love him. We can stay engaged forever. He can stay in the closet forever." Ryan shrugs. "It doesn't matter to me." It _does_ matter, of course. But not in the way Ryan suspects Ron thinks it does.

Ron nods, starting to walk again, a long breath blown out as he thinks through what Ryan's said. "Then I guess I don't have anything else to say on the matter, other than welcome to the family," he says with a small smile and shrug, glancing over at Ryan. His future son-in-law.

It's hard for Ryan to accept the words gracefully when he feels so ill at ease, but he appreciates that it's probably a difficult thing for Ron to say. "Thanks," he says softly, giving the man a little shrug in return. "I'll try to be, you know, worthy of it. And I think you and my dad will like each other." And god knows it might be good for the two men to be able to simply talk the stereotypical beer and football, and pretend for a while that gay sex doesn't even exist.

"I'm sure we will. I'm more worried about Jeanne and your mum. They might have the two of you getting married next year by the end of the evening," Ron jokes, trying to ease the tension he knows is still there and mostly his fault.

"Oh hell, no. My mum would want at least a year just to plan, or she'll feel like we cheated her out of the experience. You know, harassing florists and caterers to distraction, and nonsense details like that," Ryan says, smiling a little. "She's only barely resigned herself that she never had any daughters."

"Yes, but daughters might have wanted to make their own plans," Ron points out. "I trust you and Sam'll be pretty happy to let her take over?"

"Oh yeah, absolutely. We're not going to argue with her about the difference between off-white and eggshell, you know?" Ryan drags a hand through his hair, ruffling it. He's not entirely comfortable with the idea of his mum getting her hands on their wedding plans, but he's smart enough to surrender to the inevitable sooner rather than later.

"Do you think it'll be a big wedding?" Ron asks.

"Not if Sam and I can help it. You know he's not really into all the spectacle. Of course, that's where the mums come in..." Ryan says ruefully. "What do you think Jeanne would want?" He's well aware that, all things considered, this will be her only opportunity to plan a wedding for her child as well.

"She'll want whatever you two want and she'll probably be happy to let your mum be in charge. Our wedding, we only had fifty including the wedding party," Ron says. "Of course, we didn't have much money then, and neither of us had huge families."

"I don't think we'll be selling the exclusive photography rights to People magazine or anything," Ryan jokes. "It'll probably be on the beach, with a barbecue afterwards. Plenty of beer..." He sighs. "You know I want to make you as comfortable as I can, right?" Even if Ron's comfort level is hardly Ryan's first concern in life, it's still something he worries about.

"The only way that'll happen is time," Ron tells Ryan. "I like you, I really do, and as I said, I can't imagine a better match for Sam -- in a man, but the fact you _are_ a man and that he's planning on the two of you settling down forever, that's something I have to get used to." He gives Ryan a smile. "But I will. I promise."

It's nice to hear the words. After all, Ron would hardly make such a vow if he was disgusted by Ryan, right? "All right," he says softly, but he can't help asking, "What did you think when he first told you he liked men?"

"He _didn't_ tell me," Ron says, looking away. "His mum and I walked in on him and one of his mates."

Ryan winces. He's heard that story, but... "Sorry, I didn't realize you'd never talked about it after." After all, Sam told him that they fought about it. "It must have been difficult for you, like that."

Ron nods. "He reassured us he still liked girls and I think his mum and I, we both jumped on that, the idea that it was just experimenting."

 _Fuck_. "It's not," Ryan says softly. "He still likes women, but I'm the person he fell in love with." He sighs. "I guess it was easier on my parents that way, since once I came out they knew for sure I was gay and there was no hope of that."

Ron nods again. "He may still like women, but he's never talked to us about any of them the way he talks about you."

Ryan ducks his head, warmed by the objective words. "I'm good to him. Not that I'm trying to say that someone else wouldn't be, but I'm good _for_ him. That should be some reassurance, at least."

"It is," Ron says. "And I'm sorry I didn't respond the way I should've when he told me about your engagement. Sometimes the words are out of my mouth before I really think about them."

"That's okay." Ryan studies the pavement beneath their feet. "I'd imagine it's really hard to hear that your child is doing something that's the complete opposite of what you've always expected. Difficult to adjust to."

Ron glances over at Ryan, empathy being the last thing he'd expect from the man. God knows Jeanne and Sam have given him enough shit over the last few weeks. "It is. As a parent, you spend so much of your life trying to make things easier for your kids, trying to protect them, and then they go and choose the most difficult path."

Ryan chuckles under his breath. "I didn't think of it quite that way. It sounds... pretty frustrating. He's succeeded at it so far, though," he offers. "You raised him strong. Even with the worst-case scenario, Sam would land on his feet and make something good of his life. Something special." Ryan has complete faith in his lover.

Ron nods. "Has he told you what I did when he dropped out of school?"

Tension floods Ryan's body in an instant. "Yes," he admits softly. "But I've tried to like you in spite of that."

Ron exhales softly. "I thought I was doing the right thing at the time. My dad? When I did something he didn't like, he'd beat the shit out of me. I never once touched Sam when he was growing up. Jeanne and I didn't believe in that, but when he dropped out of school and he didn't have any plans, I didn't know what to do. I thought when I put him on the plane with enough money for a room and food and told him to work his way back, he'd spend a few days out there, realize how rough things are in the real world and change his mind about school. I didn't really think he'd take me seriously, but he did,"he says, exhaling softly, "and I couldn't ask him to come home."

A smile tugs at the corner of Ryan's mouth. "Sam's not the type to come home with his tail between his legs," he agrees. "You set him a challenge, and he rose to it." Of course with that action, Ron had also set the stage for any emotional distance to come between himself and his son, but Ryan doesn't know how much of that had already existed.

"Yeah, and he's never forgiven for me for it," Ron says. "Every generation gets to mess up their kids in a different way. You think you're doing the right thing, that you're not like your own parents, and then it turns out you've found out a new way to screw up."

"Great. So that's what we have to look forward to," Ryan jokes. Wasn't Ron just saying recently that he _wanted_ Sam and Ryan to have kids? Oh, well. "But then you get to be grandparents. That's supposed to be way better than being a parent, because you can give them back whenever you're tired of them."

"Yeah." Ron nods, rubbing a hand over his beard. "I think I'm probably not expressing myself very well again. My point is," he says to Ryan, stopping again, "everything I've ever done was out of love for my son, whether it came out that way or not. And I'm glad he's found someone who loves him as much as we do, even if you're not exactly what I was expecting. He needs you, I can tell, and I wish you both a long healthy and happy life together." He gives Ryan a small smile. "And that's what I should have said on the phone."

Ryan smiles at him, studying Ron's eyes. He's got only a vague sense of how unusual this admission must be for Ron, but it feels pretty monumental. "Do you think you'll be able to tell Sam that? Or do you want me to pass the message on?"

"Knowing me, I'll likely stick my foot in it," Ron says, starting to walk again, gesturing towards the path he wants to take. "You can tell him."

"All right." Ryan is a bit hesitant - feeling that Ron and Sam really should be having this talk - but he's willing to accede to Ron's wishes on the matter. "I think it'll make him happy to hear that."


End file.
